Make more than a mark!

In the basement of my grandparents home there is a doorframe. On one side of this frame, my growth since childhood is inked on the stained wood in my Grandfather’s handwriting, which has failed to change these last 40 years. My childhood was one of apartment hopping. To have a stable place at my grandparents home was a significant source of comfort. When my Grandfather would say, “Let’s go see how you measure up, kiddo,” my heart would leap with pride and curiosity.


Now that I have two daughters and a stable home, I took up that tradition. Each daughter has her own side in the frame that leads to our bedroom from a small sitting room in our 110-year-old house. In the beginning I carved a mark with a knife and inked the date just as my Grandfather did.

After a few short years, I realized this was ceremony and needed more formality because my daughters took great pride in seeing how much they’ve grown.

One day, at the mom and pop hardware store looking for a simple sliding bolt, I noticed several brass plates hanging on a rack and the idea hit. Then I recalled the fanciful tops of upholstery tacks and the idea grew.

The timing of this project converged with my husband’s upcoming birthday. For his 41st birthday I unveiled this new system that has grown into a work of art - of sorts. Looking back, I wish that I had done more planning and used a straight edge to place those upholstery tacks in a straight line. However, I see a symbolism in their uneven placement. Growth is not straight and neatly arranged; it is random, unpredictable and comes in spurts.

On their birthday and half-birthdays, we measure our daughter’s height and add a tack and a plate to the doorframe. They eagerly look forward to this event. It’s become a rite of passage. Often times, I will find my daughters just looking at their charts, running their fingers over the tacks and plates. I wonder what they're thinking about, but don’t ask.

As for me and my husband, we will always have this threshold, even after our girls venture out into the big world to make another mark. And, we will walk through this threshold every night and every morning.

As for the doorframe at my grandparent’s house, I’d jump in a heartbeat if he wanted to size me up today. There, notches from my daughters mingle with mine. They love seeing how they measure up to me. I do too.

Best Idea Preservation Ever!

My two daughters Poe and Little Pie Golightly spend time working on our Idea Books every six months or so. We sit on the bedroom floor with a pile of magazines, each armed with a pair of age-appropriate scissors ready to tackle those magazines for inspiration.


We look for ideas to clip and stick in our books. These ideas can come from anywhere, garden, fashion, recipes, crafts, places we’d like to visit, things we’d like to have, room décor, things that inspire a story, books we’d like to read…

Sometimes we laugh at our ideas, sometimes we all nod in agreement and sometimes it’s rock, paper, scissors over who gets the clipping for their book.


At the end of each session we sit on a new area rug made of slick magazine paper cuttings, clips, scraps, pages, and mangled magazines. Our idea books? They are neat and tidy and are ready to flip through when we need creative inspiration or when we want something but we’re quite certain what it is. The books always provide personal guidance.

Poe and Little Pie each have one book. Me? I have four: 1) Graphic Design elements, 2) Garden, 3) Home décor, 4) Fashion.

Conserving Family Lexicon

Think of all those words our children make up, or how they morph proper words into their own vernacular. Those small utterances are the most precious, silly or insightful things we’ve every heard. We think there is no way we could ever forget them. But, we often do. In the photo to the left, my girls are yelling their childhood words into a basin to catch a few echoes.

With the ease of word processing we can build a living legacy Family Dictionary. Enter these words as we hear them and secure the family lexicon for generations to come. The front pages of a dictionary should help one assemble pronunciation keys and proper layout. Dictionary.com is also a great resource.

Be creative in defining the word. For example if the word is “moomie,” don’t define it as a movie. Write a definition from the child’s perspective like “a motion picture that is usually watched four times a month like the moomie, Babe.” Here are a few examples:

Ab.so.loo.py (āb'soh-lōōp'pē) adv. why yes!
Origin: Little Poe, 1998.
Da.doo (dā'dōō) v. to offer gratitude.
Origin: Little Mommy, 1970.
Grass.pop.per (grās'pop'pər) n. any of numerous herbivorous insects, that jump great distances while simultaneously making a buzzing sound that is frightening but oddly intriguing.
Origin: Little Pie, 2003 while camping in a meadow in the Rockies.
Meesh.mal.low (mēsh'māl'ō) n. a sugar confection, usually soft and spongy, usually roasted on a
stick over the campfire.
Origin: Little Jimmy, 1964.
Pan.a.cake (pān'ə'kāk') n. a small, flat pat of batter, scientifically proven to have more valleys and ridges than Kansas, fried on both sides with Papa’s panacake Pan on Sunday mornings.
Origin: Little Pie, 2003.
Up.stairs Back.wards (ŭp'stârz' bāk'wərdz) adj. downstairs.
Origin: Little Poe, 2000 at Papa’s house in Virginia in the middle of the night.

A living Family Dictionary of Quotations also makes a great legacy too. Follow the format style of other books of quotations; they are usually organized in alpha order by person. I think it best to list the quotations chronologically. A sample may look something like:

Little Pie, 2001-

1. Don’t bother my truth! 2004
2. You are going to hear two different stories. Mine is the truth! 2007, Said to TKH while on a play date.
3. Daddy, are you available for me to jump on your stomach? 2009

Little Po, 1997-

1. The Dolly Mama is a Buddhist Chipmunk who teaches us compassion. 2000
2. Brie cheese tastes like the floor of the hardware store. 2001
3. This store smells like bottoms. 2001, Said while walking through a leather furniture store.
4. We are playing “I Win!” 2001, Said in reference to her Uncle Kiko’s question: What card game are we playing? You keep changing the rules.

Enjoy it! To think you might start something that spans the lives of many generations. I think our children would be proud to see their names in a dictionary or book of quotations. There is no doubt it would make them feel important and loved and give their children a good laugh at what their parents said when they were once small.